The first thing she saw was a leather chair faintly glowing in the moonlight, familiar with its corner torn and stuffing slightly protruding.
‘We’ve finally reached the carriage.’
It was the same carriage she and Dietrian had entered after crossing the gravel desert. Leticia blinked slowly, curled up in her seat.
‘When will these dreams end?’
Would they continue until she reached the Principality?
Soon the carriage came to a halt. Voices could be heard outside the closed door.
“Your Majesty, are you really going to punish Banessa under martial law?”
“Banessa insulted my wife. He disobeyed my order to respect her, so it’s only right.”
“But, Your Majesty…”
“Don’t make me repeat myself, Yulken.”
Dietrian’s voice was heavy with resolve.
“I’ve warned repeatedly. If he attacks her again, I will not forgive him.”
“…”
“There will be no reversal of my decision. Now go back.”
“Understood.”
Leticia felt disheartened.
Of all days, this memory had to appear in her dream.
It was today that Dietrian had first punished one of his men for disrespecting her.
The carriage door opened with a creak, casting a long shadow on the floor. Leticia closed her eyes in gloom.
‘I wish the next dream would come quickly.’
Her memories related to the carriage were mostly unpleasant.
Dietrian had only ever shown devotion to her.
Even in a dream, she felt sorry for only receiving from him. Regrettably, the dream continued.
“Leticia, can you take some medicine?”
Leticia was unable to respond, her body feeling unbearably heavy. Anticipating this, Dietrian gently supported her neck, tilting it slightly to help her swallow the medicine.
Soon, a lukewarm and slightly bitter liquid trickled into her mouth. After she swallowed, Dietrian carefully wiped her lips, his touch as gentle as if handling delicate glass.
“You might feel a bit cold.”
He then used a damp cloth to tenderly wipe the sweat from her forehead and neck.
Throughout, Dietrian continued to care for her. He regularly checked her temperature and pulse to monitor the medicine’s effects, replaced the cool cloth on her forehead, and fetched fresh water whenever it warmed even slightly.
All the while, Leticia lay limp in his arms, unable to move or assist in any way.
‘Why does this dream feel so real?’
She felt frustrated. She wanted to get up right away and assert that she could take care of herself. But her body was just as weak as it had been in the past, with only her consciousness remaining sharp.
Leticia closed her eyes, mentally urging the dream to move on.
‘Please, let it be the next dream. Move on.’
The dream didn’t shift to the next one, but Dietrian’s caregiving eventually ended. He meticulously covered her with a blanket and sat beside her, a peaceful silence enveloping them. After some time passed, a soft voice broke the quiet.
“Ever since I was young, my brother was my idol. He was the most perfect person in the world to me.”
Surprised, Leticia perked up her ears, hoping to catch any clue that might help Dietrian.
“Yet, after he left, I resented him for a very long time.”
As she listened intently, Leticia noticed something different about his voice—it was much softer than she remembered.
‘Is it because this is a dream?’
In dreams, not only memories but also desires are intertwined. Leticia’s longing to be loved by him made his voice sound so affectionate, even though she knew it was a dream.
Despite realizing it was a dream, Leticia felt a flutter of excitement.
“But I’ve come to be grateful for being left alone in this world. Because, in the empire… I met you.”
His words left Leticia momentarily stunned.
…Did he just say he’s grateful for meeting me?
‘Must have misheard it,’ she thought.
Then she heard a faint, deflated laugh.
“What a person I am…”
Leticia was confused.
‘Have I ever heard such words from him?’
Was this truly a dream of the past?
Her mind was a whirl, but she could hear the rustling of his clothes as he got up. The carriage floor creaked slightly, and a warm touch reached her fingertips – his breath.
Leticia’s confusion deepened. Even with her eyes closed, she could feel his gaze distinctly.
‘Why is he looking at me like this?’
Why was he suddenly looking at her so intently?
If it weren’t a dream, she would have been sweating profusely. Or more likely, she would have opened her eyes, unable to bear it.
“Leticia…”
Yes, this had to be a dream.
Such a strange dream.
“Leticia, my wife, my person…”
That must be why he was calling her name with such tenderness in the dream.
Leticia, with her eyes still closed, began to sob softly.
“…Are you crying again?”
When had she ever cried in front of him? She didn’t recall shedding tears in his presence.
His long fingers gently wiped her tears away, a touch as soft as a feather brushing against her skin.
Leticia was certain.
Yes, this is a dream.
It’s all a dream.
A fantasy filled with her own desires.
So it was perfectly plausible.
“…Can I ever make you smile?”
That earnest question, the warmth enveloping her cheek.
The kiss on her forehead.
All of it.
* * *
Before she knew it, she was in the fifth dream.
Looking at the familiar yet strange Principality palace, Leticia pressed her hand against her chest.
The remnants of the fourth dream lingered quite a bit. She still felt the sensation of his lips on her forehead.
‘Why do I keep having these dreams?’
Who kept showing her these painfully heartfelt scenes?
‘What does this immense power mean?’
She couldn’t even guess.
‘But it’s just a dream, I’ll wake up soon.’
Resolved to contemplate after waking from the dream, Leticia looked around.
‘This dream is… could it be?’
Her expression turned to shock. The first thing she saw was a shiny tombstone.
The empty grave of Julios.
Near the grave, there was a torn piece of paper, the corner adorned with a golden emblem.
‘Could it be that day?’
Rushing to the tombstone, Leticia picked up the torn paper.
“The King’s insolence is punished by feeding the remains of the exiled prince to wild beasts…”
Leticia closed her eyes tightly.
Her suspicion was correct.
She was dreaming of the day she received the letter about Josephina desecrating Julios’ remains.
That day, Dietrian left the marital chamber for the first time since their marriage. There was another reason that day was special.
‘Where is Dietrian?’
She tucked the letter inside her clothes and looked around.
‘If my memory serves me right, he should be…’
Leticia quickly walked towards the inner part of the garden.
Crossing the shadowy garden, she approached a familiar thicket. Without hesitation, she entered, her eyes brimming with tears.
‘As expected.’
There was Dietrian, pale and gasping for breath, leaning against a tree.
The shock of losing his brother’s remains and the strain of spending the night in the cold rain had taken a toll on him.
He had hidden in this secluded spot to avoid being seen in such a state.
“Ugh…”
True to her memory, Dietrian’s forehead was burning hot. His fever was so severe that his lips were white and parched.
Even as she approached him closely, he was so ill that he didn’t notice her presence.
Knowing it was a dream, her heart still ached as if it would tear apart.
“Your Highness, please wait. I’ll call for help.”
“No…”
Even though he didn’t recognize her, he whispered desperately.
Tears welled up in Leticia’s eyes, overwhelmed with guilt for being the cause of his pain.
“Alright, just wait a moment, Your Highness.”
She sat beside him, guarding him with a heart full of earnestness.
Throughout, he kept groaning in pain. His parched lips looked painfully dry.
‘He needs water.’
With that thought, her actions flowed seamlessly, as if repeating a past life.
Just like before, Leticia carefully supported the back of his neck. She took out a water bottle and tilted it towards his lips.
The clear water seemed to moisten his lips for a moment before trickling away.
The little water she managed to give him didn’t cool his fevered lips. Soon, there was only a sip of water left in the bottle.
Dietrian remained unconscious.
Leticia took the last bit of water into her mouth.
Then, slowly, she pressed her lips to his.
It was their first and last kiss from a past life. The sensation of his hot, dry lips was vivid.
Since he was unconscious, Dietrian didn’t easily drink the water. Eventually, Leticia’s tongue awkwardly touched the tip of his, helping him to swallow.
Shortly after, his throat moved longingly, and the pooled water disappeared.
Leticia removed her lips and leaned Dietrian’s head against the tree.
In her past life, she had immediately regretted her action.
Dietrian hated her. On a day like today, that hatred would have been even greater.
Had he regained consciousness, he surely wouldn’t have forgiven her.
‘It would have been much better to call a doctor than to give him a little water.’
Thinking this, she had stood up and left.
In this dream, Leticia repeated the same action. She was about to leave the bush without looking back when, unlike in the past, a faint voice reached her ears.
“…Don’t go.”
A gentle breeze softly tousled Leticia’s hair.
“Don’t leave… ticia.”
It was as if the wind carried someone’s voice to her.
Leticia turned around in surprise.
The thicket remained still and silent. Though she felt compelled to check inside once more, a sense of fear held her back.
Her hesitation was brief. Finally, Leticia stepped back into the thicket. Dietrian was still unconscious, leaning against the tree.
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