Damian gave her a lot. She was treated more properly than expected, no, she was treated undeservedly.
It wasn’t like this before. The old Lily Islar was a useless person.
But after she had a fever, Lilian changed. As the daughter of Turin, she behaved properly as the only daughter of a Marquis. She even managed to save Damian by leading her sick and lacking body through the crisis.
Cedric loves her terribly.
But what she really is hadn’t changed and she remained the same as Lily?
Damian Rupenwein will treat Lilian as a Grand Duchess. But far from being indifferent, the number of times they touched were increasing.
It may not be love, but as a wife, it was evident that he was quite satisfied with Lily.
She honestly didn’t hate him for that either. How many people can hate being treated well by a man with whom they’re supposed bound to for the rest of their lives?
To make matters worse, what if Lily gave up her current role and became a useless person again?
What if she became a helplessly sick person on the verge of death?
She didn’t even have to try. Lilian had seen and knew the outcome.
She didn’t want to be like that.
Never.
‘I want to die as a useful person to the end and not disappoint others.’
Even though she said it like talking about a stranger, for some reason, only Damian came to mind.
“The story of a friend of a friend’s happy arranged marriages” which her sorority classmates shared happily for a long time, came to mind at the same time.
She also remembered the moment when she said that ‘it could become love’.
Yes, it can be love in this way too.
But this shouldn’t be love.
A time limit of only five years. Lilian was the kind of person who shouldn’t give her heart to anyone more than necessary.
So just for a little while, just a little bit, allow her a place to be.
She won’t love or be loved.
A person that’s at least a little useful, then she’ll die quietly with only that much.
Just don’t take that away.
‘I promise that it would change, that I would change. I’m still so terribly selfish.’
The body, which was losing its vitality, was slowly shrinking as if preparing for hibernation.
She couldn’t digest well and vomited it up, so the amount she ate naturally decreased.
In such a state, blood was often shed, so her body couldn’t stand it.
She naturally fell asleep. Her eyes started to close slightly.
“Miss?”
“I will rest for a bit.”
Lilian wanted to run away from this painful thoughts at this moment, just for a moment.
“When I’m asleep, no one should come in…”
Just a little while.
***
She couldn’t keep her promise to take a break for just a while.
Lilian ended up not attending dinner.
Her stew went cold in front of an empty seat. Then the attendant who had gone to ask about Lilian’s condition returned.
Damian asked.
“How about my wife?”
“Well, they said she’s sleeping soundly and is going to sleep until tomorrow.”
“…”
Damian patted his chin slowly, lost in his thoughts. He hadn’t even touch the food.
A heavy silence ensued, which made it difficult to even breath.
Damian finally removed the napkin from his lap and stood up.
“I have to go see my wife.”
However, Damian’s visit didn’t come as expected.
“I’m sorry, Your Highness the Grand Duke. Right now, Her Highness has ordered that no one enter.”
Rita, he believed. He already knew that the red-haired maid was fiercely loyal to her mistress.
“Miss Hayworth, I am my wife’s husband.”
“The Duchess said ‘nobody’.”
“Did my wife tell you that ‘nobody’ included the husband with whom she signed the marriage certificate and promised to live with for the rest of her life?”
“She didn’t say it that specifically, but I think it should be taken that way when she said ‘nobody’ in general.”
Nobody.
Damian didn’t want to get caught up in that.
He was rather sad than angry.
“That’s Miss Hayworth’s thought. I’ll ask the Duchess myself, so get out of the way.”
“She is not in a state to answer.”
“Then I should look even more. I am the Duchess’ husband. She’s taking a nap for a while, skipping meals and in a state where she can’t even answer questions, so are you blocking by including me in that ‘nobody’ category?”
“The Duchess needs me.”
That was the only thing Damian Rupenwein could cling to.
Even if he’s pushed away and rejected, even if Lily hates him, he is ‘the person she needs’.
That one fact was holding Damian up.
“I apologize.”
The stern Rita also stepped aside, knowing that she understood what he said.
Damian grabbed the doorknob. In his temper, he wanted to open it wide, but his Duchess was sleeping inside.
He carefully opened the door and entered. A faint smell of herbs wafted through the dimly lit room.
Damian walked over to the bed where Lilian was lying. He pulled the string and the translucent curtains faded away.
Lilian lay on her side sleeping, unaware of the world.
He saw her face. It was just that but his heart that was so angry quickly softened.
“Lily…”
He put a hand on her cheek. A hot sigh escaped from Lilian’s mouth.
After a while.
“Um…”
Lily opened her eyes sensitively.
Her expression looked distressed, as if the slightest task of pushing up her eyelids was too much for her.
His stomach is boiling. Sad, frustrated, loving, and hurt, Damian bowed. Then he put his lips on Lily’s cheek with regret.
“…Your Highness?”
Lilian regained some energy at the familiar surge of mana.
After confirming that the light had returned to Lily’s eyes, Damian knelt beside the bed.
Their eyes met. Damian pulled Lily’s hand out of the way and kissed the back of her hand.
The mana that had been raging due to the fluctuating emotions found stability. The painful headache and the burning sensation was gone.
Damian sighed. As he rubbed the dry hand against his cheek, Lily casually caressed his cheeks.
How can he not love someone like this.
“Are you feeling better?”
“Yes, what time is it…”
Lily, who had been muttering, was startled.
“Your Higness, how are you…”
Damian laughed softly. It’s also confirmation that he’s a person who enters the “nobody” category. He was heartbroken, but didn’t show it.
“I just came in on a whim. It’s a little past dinner time.”
“Ah…”
Lilian groaned and closed her eyes. When she opened them again, her eyes were clearer than before.
It felt like bringing a doll to life. As he watched her regain some of her strength, his uneasiness slowly subsided.
“I told you not to overdo it.”
Lily laughed a little at the complaint mixed with resentment.
“I’m sorry. By the way, I promised the Head Butler than I would eat duck meat…”
Damian, who was trying to stop Lilian from getting up, reminded her that she hadn’t eaten properly in days and helped her get up.
“The food is ready. I think the Head Butler would be happy if you said you’d eat it here.”
Lily, who had been keeping her eyes closed to endure the dizziness, nodded.
“Could you please call Rita?”
Another not pretty sound. When those pretty lips came to their senses, they only say things that are not so pretty.
“Sometimes, even the handmaids takes some time off as well.”
“Yes?”
Picking up his nonsense, Damian propped a pillow under Lily’s waist.
He was someone who didn’t know how to serve anyone, but he got used to this kind of thing before he knew it because he was keenly aware of Lily.
“Thank you, Your Highness.”
“What…”
Damian, who was trying to tell her not to be too grateful for everything, saw the marks on Lilian’s sleeve.
A brown stain that became black in the dark room.
At first glance, it was a very small stain that might have been an ink stain, but Damian, who had spent a long time on the battlefield, instantly recognized it.
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