Lee Young-jin drove along the sea, pondering what to do next. His smartphone vibrated a couple of times. It was from Teacher’s secretary. As always, the message was urging. Holding the steering wheel with one hand, Lee Young-jin fumbled on the passenger seat with the other hand and picked up his smartphone. He fumbled over the panel and sent a short reply. [I’m on it]
On the flight back to Seoul, Lee Young-jin stared out the window the entire time. He could only see the whitish clouds. He wished he could reach out and part those feather-like clouds to see further beyond.
When he landed at Gimpo Airport and returned home, it was still five in the afternoon. Several messages had arrived on his smartphone. One was a missed call. It was a call received while he was on the plane. The caller was Teacher. Lee Young-jin quietly looked at the missed call log and pressed the screen to call back. The ringing didn’t last long. A soft voice picked up after three or four rings.
[Young-jin.]
“Yes, teacher. You called?”
[Yes. How’s the work going?]
“I’m working on it, but…”
[It seems to be not going well.]
“The security system seems to have changed a bit…”
[Hmm. Why couldn’t you answer the phone?]
“I was asleep.”
[Sleeping too much during the day isn’t good for you.]
“I’m, I’m sorry.”
His heart continued to race.
It was the first time he lied to Teacher. Sweat pooled in his palms, the back of his neck became damp, and his neck stiffened. He was gasping for breath. His heart, wedged between two inflated lungs, thudded rapidly. There was no chance of being caught. He had already dealt with all the security cameras in this villa, used a different alias unknown to Teacher, and even the reservations for the flight and rental car were all under different names…
[Alright.]
After about five minutes of babbling into the phone, Teacher spoke shortly. His voice was low and dragging, signaling the end of the conversation. Under normal circumstances, this would have been regrettable and lonely, making him want to extend the conversation by any means, but this time it was a relief.
[Contact me as soon as the job is done. Can you do that?]
“Yes, yes.”
Lee Young-jin nodded several times in response. A low chuckle came from the other side of the smartphone.
[Alright. Teacher trusts Young-jin.]
With that, the call ended.
Lee Young-jin held the phone, drenched in cold sweat, for a long time. It took a while before he could finally put down the smartphone. He took a few staggering steps and slumped down on the single bed. The spring mattress sank and wobbled. He leaned his head back and stared blankly at the ceiling. The shadow of the fluorescent light flickered on the gray ceiling. A chilly loneliness washed over him like a wave. Lee Young-jin huddled his shoulders. His lower lip quivered.
It was cold. He wanted to embrace someone, anyone. He wanted to share their warmth.
Lee Young-jin reminisced about the soft bed and the feather-like duvet that seemed to fly away. The memory of touching an alpha’s back inside a duvet hot with burning heat. The thick texture and rugged ridges of muscles on that back, like delicate engravings. The sensation of the elastic erector muscles, the spine, and the shoulder blades that wrapped around the back, as tactile as tough rubber.
Lee Young-jin was utterly absorbed in that memory.
He lay on his side on the bed, rubbing his cheek against the rough sheets. His eyelids burned, and a hot lump of magma roiled inside his belly. A single tear drop lingered on the bridge of his nose before falling onto the sheet.
He writhed on the sheet for a few minutes, knees pressed tightly together, then gasped for breath as he lifted himself up. His arms, propped on the mattress, trembled. His breath was hot, and his eyelids fluttered under half-lowered brows.
He was thirsty.
Dragging his feet, he went to the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. He grabbed and pulled out a half-empty bottle of water, bringing it to his lips. Before he could take a few sips, the cold sensation passing through his esophagus into his lower abdomen made him shiver.
Lee Young-jin put the water bottle back in the refrigerator and turned around. He fumbled on the hanger for a coat and put it on. He carelessly wrapped a scarf around his neck, shoved his smartphone and wallet into his pockets, and pushed his feet into sneakers as he pushed open the front door. The cold air brushed against his forehead and cheeks, but he hardly noticed, let alone cared.
His body was still hot.
Sweat made his thighs and the insides of his knees slick. It was as if he was struck by a severe fever, heat coursing through his body.
Lee Young-jin knew this heat.
He knew how persistent and severe it was.
He dragged his stiff, wooden-like legs over the rough, worn asphalt surface for ten minutes under the blinking streetlights and the tangled web of wires. Across from a building that housed a convenience store, a franchise trotter shop, and a dry cleaner, there was a pharmacy. He entered the pharmacy. His face reflected on the mirror next to the glass door was flushed on the cheeks and nose.
Lee Young-jin bought cold medicine, antipyretics, and painkillers.
The pharmacist kept glancing at Lee Young-jin’s face, probably because of the feverish appearance. The pharmacist pulled out several types of cold medicine and gave a long lecture about precautions for use. Anyway, he was a kind pharmacist. He even opened the refrigerator to take out a vitamin drink he hadn’t ordered and gave it to Lee Young-jin to drink.
“Thank you.”
Lee Young-jin expressed his gratitude and left the pharmacy.
“If the fever doesn’t go down, you have to come back.”
The pharmacist called out worriedly from behind. Lee Young-jin faintly responded with a yes. The glass door closed behind him.
Lee Young-jin dissolved the medicine in the cold vitamin drink and consumed it. The sweet vitamin liquid mixed with acetaminophen and antihistamines made its way down his throat, making his body feel languid and his limbs slack. He threw his coat on the hanger as if it were a rag and threw himself onto the bed. In one corner of the dim room, the computer engine vibrated with a hum, and the bright light from the IPS panel LCD monitor stretched all the way to the head of the bed, flickering above Lee Young-jin’s head.
The fever did not subside.
Acetaminophen, acetylsalicylic acid, ibuprofen, loxoprofen… He should have bought other kinds.
Lee Young-jin curled up, hugging his burning abdomen with both arms. Inside the damp duvet, his breath warmed up the air, growing hotter. It was involuntary to remember the hard hands that used to soothe this burning heat. Memories of those hands caressing his cheeks and nape, soaking his chest with painful licks, and reaching inside his thighs tormented him.
Lee Young-jin groaned under the duvet for a long time, waiting for the medicine to take effect, and eventually drifted into a shallow sleep. In a drowsy state of semi-consciousness, he hallucinated an alpha cooling down his body’s heat. The alpha leaned over the bed, supporting himself with one hand, and kissed Lee Young-jin. He writhed under that kiss. When he woke up in the middle of the night, his groin was damp. The heat had receded, presumably due to the medicine’s effect. Lee Young-jin ran the washing machine late at night with his face flushed red. And, sitting in front of the computer with drowsy eyes, he listened to the thumping sound of the washing machine. He opened several screens and tapped away at the keyboard. The screens that appeared on the monitor began to disappear quickly. A report with Park Eun-young’s name, a contract with the prosecution’s electronic signature, Park Eun-young’s profile with her photo attached, several photos of her, Park Eun-young standing in front of an inconspicuous three-story villa in Seogwipo City, Jeju Island, alongside an undercover detective. All of that information was rapidly deleted. Before ten seconds had passed, all the data Lee Young-jin had collected over 45 hours underwent an irreversible process and was cleanly erased.
***
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